Have you ever. . .
done something God wanted you to do – and thought you couldn’t? . . . but did because it really wasn’t about your ability but His ability? Because you trusted him to help you do it?
Have you ever. . .
done something you thought God wanted you to do – and, too late you realized God didn’t ask you do to that. . . . you just jumped into it, thinking it sounded like a God-thing and didn’t ask him if that was Him telling you?
My list for doing something God wanted me to do and I thought I couldn’t but trusted him – well, that list is much shorter than all the things I rushed into just assuming that because I thought they sounded good, they must be God-inspired. (I have pages and pages of pages of these. I’m never really comfortable recalling them. These “have-you-evers” never ended the way I anticipated them ending, resulting in bruised pride,shame at overstepping into a place God had not called me to be, and a humbled spirit).
Have you ever. . .
called out for a storm to calm itself, asked a mountain to be move . . . or sat on the edge of a diving board, and wondered if you could walk on water?
. . . wondered if your faith was big enough. . . to walk on water . . . because, if your faith was big enough – you’d be able to – right? After all, apparently for a few short minutes, Peter did – before his faith shook and he started to sink.
More than once, I’ve sat on the edge of a diving board and thought about this. One summer evening, I sat on my mother and father-in-laws diving board a long, long time ago and thought, staring at this beautiful blue between the house and the barn . . . could my faith be strong enough, sure enough – for a few short moments?
I believed then and I believe now that miracles weren’t just for the 12 and the 70. Holy Spirit power hasn’t been watered down or thinned out with wear and tear. That summer evening I sat there wanting the love for my savior and my faith to be big enough . . . to walk on water. . . .
Have you done that? Sat there and wondered?
I finally screwed up my courage, pulled myself up to stand, and took that one step, hoping for a few short moments, my faith would be big enough, sure enough . . . . one step and I sank straight down to the bottom of the pool.
Was it because my faith and love for my savior weren’t big enough, true enough?
Summertime with its pools, beaches and water play didn’t cause this “walking on water” memory to resurface. I gave one of my sons The One Year Chronological Bible for Christmas a few years ago. He read and completed it through his senior year of high school. When he finished last summer, I thought I ought to do the same thing – so I borrowed his. I should finish by my birthday in August. It has opened my eyes to so many things I’ve missed before – and given me such a better understanding not only of historical context but of so much more. Summertime just coincided with where I am in this one year bible reading experience.
After Jesus fed the 5,000 men (besides all those women and children), he sent the disciples ahead in a boat to the other side while he took some quiet time in the mountains to pray. While he was praying, the disciples didn’t get very far in their journey because the waves and wind slowed their progress. Between 3 and 6 a.m. in the morning, the disciples saw him walking toward them on the water.
The scripture says they were “terrified” when they saw him. I imagine they were worn out, too – having rowed and rowed and seemingly gotten nowhere fast. Jesus seeing their fear and exhaustion encouraged them, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid” (Matthew 14:27).
I imagine their courage was not only bolstered, but the awe and adrenaline from seeing such a miracle woke and revitalized them.
Then Peter said, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water” (Matthew 14:28).
Let’s break this down – this is where I missed it – have missed it most of my life until this week. Peter didn’t bolt out of the boat in excitement. Neither Jesus didn’t expect any of those in the boat to climb out and walk to him as a testament of their faith. A pool, a river, lake or ocean depth is not itself a pass/fail test of our faith. Jesus doesn’t mock us, saying, “If you really, really, truly believed, you’d be able to walk on water to me.” No! That’s not Jesus. That’s Satan baiting us to do things we are not called to do.
The want to walk out to Jesus rose up within Peter first. After that “want to do” rose up, Peter did two things.
First, Peter asked if this “want to do” came from Jesus.
Next, Peter asked for permission: “Command me to Jesus.”
And Jesus did! Jesus told Peter, “Come.” (Matthew 14:29).
You know – that walking on the pool water thing never worked for me. Not because I didn’t have faith enough – but because that wasn’t something God called me to do. He called Peter to do that: put the desire in him to go to Jesus like that – and before Peter acted, he checked with Jesus first.
Walking on water? That’s Peter’s faith story. Not yours and mine. We are not called to do everything in everyone’s story. We are called to walk out our story, not our story plus everyone else’s story.
The next time a “want to do” rises within me to do something for Christ, I need to ask:
“Lord, is this you putting the desire to do this within me?”
If he tells me, “Yes,” then I need to ask, “Command me, Lord (Matthew 14:29) – and I will do this thing you’ve asked me because I don’t want to do anything out of my own selfish desires, pride, ego and wants. I only want to do it if Jesus wants me to do it.”
And, you know what? Maybe in the beginning what he’s asked you to do feels as impossible as walking on water. Maybe what he’s asked you to do calls for a big step of faith. Maybe it’s offering to pray for a stranger in the middle of the cucumbers and peppers in the grocery store. Maybe it’s telling a group of women the story of why you believe. Maybe it’s enrolling in college or signing up for a Mission trip. Maybe it’s saying “I do” on a perfect day – and stepping into a 75 year journey where all the days aren’t perfect. Maybe it’s living day-in-day-out faith, hope and love in a hard challenge – and choosing joy when nothing feels like joy. Maybe making a dream come alive.
In the beginning, the adrenaline of the call stirs to action where God says, “Yes. I want you to do this thing.” That adrenaline carries us, further than imagined, just like Peter:
“So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus” (Matthew 14:29).
However, the struggle to maintain that faith when we discover ourselves out of our depth, we just might respond just like Peter: “But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink” (Matthew 14:30a).
When Peter began to sink, he didn’t give up. He also didn’t even attempt Peter-made solutions to save himself. Some might have been cheering him on while others on the sidelines might have been asking, “Who does he think he is – walking on water? Who in their right mind thinks they can walk on water?” Some might even say he got a little above himself. Some might think he needs to be committed for such upside down thoughts.
Peter didn’t listen to scientists who said people can’t walk on water. He didn’t listen to the naysayers. He didn’t listen to people who thought he wasn’t good enough to walk on water.
Jesus had given him the go-ahead: “Come.” Come he did – but on the way, doubt set in. Instead of just thinking he had to save himself on his own, he cried out to Jesus, “Lord, save me” (Matthew 13:30). . . .
Just like the woman with the issue of blood who reached out in faithful assurance.
Just like the centurion who understood authority and by understanding authority, understood Jesus could heal his servant.
Just like the friends who brought their friend to be healed, lowered him through the roof into Jesus’ presence where he received his healing.
Just like all the people he healed throughout his ministry, including the man who said, “I believe. Help my unbelief.”
“Lord, save me” (Matthew 13:30), Peter cried out. . . with blessed assurance because Jesus wouldn’t have put that desire in Peter if Jesus didn’t have a plan to fulfill that request. Jesus never gives us a task to complete without the plan to succeed at that task. Jesus never sets those who love him up for failure.
Sometimes when I get into what Jesus wants me to do, I start second-guessing myself, doubting what He’s asked me to do. In those moments, I’m a Peter, too, though I wasn’t called to do the same things Peter did. Because Peter’s story is Peter’s and mine is mine – each of our stories – yours, mine, Peter’s – are God designed – but each different.
When I feel like I’m sinking, I just need to called out, “Lord, save me.”
And he does – just like he did for Peter. Though our stories are different – and the how’s and what we’re called to do – Jesus’ faithfulness, the unconditional love is the same.
“Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, ‘O you of little faith, why did you doubt?’ And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased. And those in the boat worshiped him, saying, ‘Truly you are the Son of God.’”(Matthew 14:31-33).
I don’t think I’m going to be sitting on any diving boards contemplating whether my faith and love in my savior is big enough to walk on water any time soon. Nanny and Papaw’s pool has long been filled in. If I find myself on sitting on the edge of a diving board, I think Jesus and I will talk about the things he has stirred me up to do, that I asked him permission to do – and the things he has said, “Yes” to do. Instead of a fail moment,, where I sink, what a beautiful rejoicing moment my savior and I will have. Maybe I don’t even have to sit on the edge of a diving board to have that conversation.
Yet, I believe that Jesus confirmed the desire for me to walk on water – and he commanded me to do so, I do believe I wouldn’t then sink to the bottom!
Trekking Through – http://www.trekkingthru.com/
http://www.richfaithrising.com/ Unite the Bloggosphere
http://purposefulfaith.com/ Cheerleading #RaRaLinkUp
http://www.messymarriage.com/ Messy Marriage
http://holleygerth.com/ Coffee for Your Heart
Mary Geisen/ TellingHisStory
abounding Grace/Graceful Tuesday/
Creativity with Art
Beautifully written. I would love to walk on water too, but I agree. God needs to call me first. I had not seen that in the many times I read this scripture. Thanks for sharing on the #LMMLinkup this week.
I hadn’t seen it, either, until this last read – but God does that. He reveals things to us incrementally! I’m so glad you came by. Wishing you God’s shalom in your week! ~ Maryleigh
Good points you make here… that often we try to bolster up the faith to do something that we hope God has called us to do, but hasnt and end up on the bottom of the lake, wondering what happened. (been there, done that!) I’m taken with the stories in scripture where God spoke so clearly and people were so sure about what He said. Maybe we’d be much better off, to sharpen our listening skills before we start jumping out of the boat! Thanks
When I look back on my faith walk, I think it started out like a child – impulsive and full speed ahead. As I’ve grown older – and learned through so many challenges- to stop, take a breath – and check with him first – and, like you pointed out, it requires sharpening my listening skills! I’m so glad you stopped by. Wishing God’s Shalom into your week! ~ Maryleigh
Ooh, I love these insights, Maryleigh! “You know – that walking on the pool water thing never worked for me. Not because I didn’t have faith enough – but because that wasn’t something God called me to do.” Thanks for reframing this for many of us. Too often we guilt ourselves into not being able to do all those things ourselves. But perhaps it is like you say—God hasn’t called us to do those exact things. He has other things in mind for us. Now to be brave enough to do those…. Thanks!
I think one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is that I don’t have to do everything – only what he’s called me to do. It is so liberating – and much less sinking! Praying bravery for both of us, though, in the things he’s called us to do!