All week long, I have been wanting to share a funny story, an incident to laugh about. After the serious posts of the last few weeks, I thought, “I need to lighten this up.” However, as much as I try, God has not let a funny story walk through my door, be pulled up from the memories stacked within, or just dog-gone hoped for.
I’m not depressed or sad, no, not even mad. Of course, as a mom, that could pop up at any moment, just like that funny moment that I’ve been waiting for. My little guy did decide that he’d better not dress up dad in a racoon costume and put him outside because he was snoring too loud inside. The little guy decided that the bears might eat his dad, and he didn’t want that to happen.
Content is what I feel. Rare contentment. Like how the warm cup feels on your cold hands at a soccer game in 52 degrees and the steam warms your nose.
The tallest one of them all came off the soccer field plastered in mud. He had a good night. He needed a good night and, despite the mud and drizzle, he was everything he and I know he is. His jersey is still soaking.
The joyful one, he’s been struggling with the move, missing the familiar. He had some friends over yesterday. His roots into the community grew a little more. My mother-spirit sighed relief.
The two little guys went to the grandparents today to play with their cousins. Something like that hasn’t been an option for 18 years. We were too far away. My sweeter-than-ice-cream mother-in-law made curtains for the boys’ rooms today. How blessed am I!
I have a job I love that allows me to work from home. No more grading college student essays. No more college students who don’t want to be there, don’t want to do the work, don’t want to get an insufficient grade for doing nothing. I do miss the students who love to learn, but I so love my new job.
I am in a place God brought me. I didn’t want to come. I miss where I’ve been. Yet, I am content, quietly content, a sitting-with-a-cup-of-coffee-and-my-world-is-at-peace-contentment.
“He who dwells in the shelter of The Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty” (Psalm 91)
As most of you mothers know, that contentment rarely lasts as long as that cup of coffee, but I will feel that moment, that sustaining moment through the toe-to-toe battles, the moments where you cannot emotionally flinch, the disappointment, the brotherly bickering, the no-matter-how-hard-I-try-I-cannot-make-everyone-happy times,and my constantly disappearing Dr. Pepper bottle.
For now, I’m going to curl up in a quilt of contentment, breath it in, savor it, and rest in it.
Thank you, God, for the funny moments,
the heart moments, the proud moments,
thank you for carrying me through the hard moments
all the other moments
and thank you, God,
for this contented time
of spiritual, emotional, and physical