Four seed packets of zinnias, 3 seeds per pellet in seed trays – I’m planning ahead for zinnia blooms in May. Thyme, Sage, Italian Parsley, Tarragon, Marjoram, Sage and Basil – 3 seeds per tray, too. They’re all sprouting, except for the Old German’s in their tray. They’re holding out.
I can count on seed-time and harvest. I can trust in my planning – and I love planning. Planning averts failure; ergo planning creates success – right?
I read book endings first, so I know how the plot unfolds as I go. I love planning vacations, holidays and the daily – all planned with buffer time for the unexpected. I plan contingency plans for the contingency plans.
I try to pre-destine the daily not accounting for the free-will asserting itself – or nature’s plans, or even God’s plans. The only thing I am sure of in this planning is that my plan is predestined to not go as planned.
I didn’t plan for one boy throwing up at 4:30 a.m. on a Thursday morning – or the nasty bug flowing and ebbing over the next 5 days. I didn’t plan for another boy catching the same bug 48 hours later, two days behind the other. Is chaos a plan?
Challenges have shown up un-invited into what should have been a seamless year, with a fall-out that affecting my boys in unplanned ways.
I didn’t plan for that.
Life throwing up unplanned, unpleasant things? “Not in my plans!” I assert, not considering I am man, fallible man. How can imperfect humanity create a perfect plan?
My plans are but pencil sketches on onion paper to God’s plans. He’s planned for every intersection crossing with other plans, like my husband’s, my boyss and everyone else’s whose path I cross in the daily. His contingencies out-contingency mine.
I’m a terrible passenger (just ask my boys who are now have their licenses) in this God-designed journey. Still gasping at some of the curves. Still saying, “Do you see that?” Still trying to slam on my air brakes. Sometimes my breath just gets caught in my chest, and I wonder if I’ll survive – but I am learning to let God drive this ride.
So when the boys throw up, and cry, “I’m hungry . . . . I don’t want Italian ices anymore” – and I stand firm on the soft, liquid diet until tummies settle down, I’m learning to embrace the plan change – and find God in it – not the sickness – but the silver lining of it.
When the boys come home,worn out, not 100%, frustrated with the make-up exams and unexpected, unplanned for chaos in the daily, and spill frustration like a sticky soda canknocked over into the day. . . . I settle into God – and after I settle into God, I make chocolate dipped pretzels with KitKat and M&M dust – because some days need extra-special, unplanned cooking – and unplanned time with God.
“We humans keep brainstorming options and plans,
but God’s purpose prevails” (Proverbs 19:21)